Unmasking Success: The Deeper Meaning Behind ‘Making It’

What does it mean to “make it” in life? For many of us, success has become synonymous with a high-paying job, fancy cars, luxurious vacations, or a certain number of followers on social media. We are constantly told that we must reach a certain benchmark in our careers, relationships, or even personal appearances to be deemed successful. But is that really the full picture?

In truth, success is far more personal, more layered than what society’s glossy images often lead us to believe. Beneath the surface, success takes on a deeper meaning, one that doesn’t fit neatly into a single definition. So let’s peel back the layers and explore what it truly means to “make it.”

Then Traditional Definition of Success

For decades, the most common measure of success has been wealth, power, and social status. We’re often guided by what psychologist Abraham Maslow termed the “Hierarchy of Needs.” At the base level, we strive for survival—food, water, shelter. As we climb higher, we seek safety, love, esteem, and at the pinnacle, self-actualization—the fulfillment of one’s potential.

Society often paints this picture of self-actualization as acquiring material wealth or power. In fact, a survey by Pew Research found that 71% of Americans said having a good job is essential to feeling successful, while 60% believe financial stability is crucial to their sense of achievement. But does this truly reflect personal fulfillment?

The Trap of External Validation

Here’s the thing: when we tie success exclusively to external validation—whether it’s a bigger paycheck, social media likes, or the approval of others—we lose sight of what truly makes us happy. According to a study by the University of California, Berkeley, individuals who pursued material wealth as their primary goal reported higher levels of stress and dissatisfaction than those who prioritized personal growth and relationships.

The constant chase for approval can feel like an endless treadmill, leaving us feeling drained and often unfulfilled. It’s not that material success is inherently bad—it’s that when it becomes our only benchmark, we can lose touch with what really matters.

Redefining Success: The Inner Dimension

True success is deeply personal, and it often has little to do with public accolades. Psychologist Carol Dweck has introduced the concept of a “growth mindset” in her research, which emphasizes the importance of learning, persistence, and personal development over rigid definitions of success. Rather than fixating on winning or losing, those with a growth mindset focus on improvement, finding joy in the process rather than just the outcome.

Consider this: some of the most successful individuals in history—Albert Einstein, Vincent van Gogh, and Maya Angelou—didn’t adhere to society’s typical standards of success. Their achievements were deeply personal, focused on creativity, curiosity, and contributing something meaningful to the world.

The Role of Relationships and Well-Being

One of the longest-running studies on happiness, the Harvard Study of Adult Development, has followed individuals for over 80 years. The results? It wasn’t wealth or career success that determined long-term happiness. The study concluded that the quality of one’s relationships is the greatest predictor of life satisfaction and well-being. As researcher Dr. Robert Waldinger, director of the study, explains: “Good relationships keep us happier and healthier. Period.”

So, when we think about “making it,” perhaps it’s not about reaching the top of the career ladder but about nurturing meaningful connections with others. Relationships, self-compassion, and inner growth all play a huge part in defining success.

Chasing Purpose Over Achievement

At its core, success is about living a life aligned with our values and passions. Positive psychology expert Martin Seligman highlights the concept of “PERMA”—a theory that suggests true well-being is composed of five key elements: Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and Accomplishment. In this model, meaning and purpose weigh just as heavily as accomplishments, showing that true success is found when we do things that give our lives purpose.

Seligman’s research suggests that people who chase purpose, rather than superficial achievements, report higher levels of well-being and life satisfaction. Whether it’s raising a family, contributing to a cause, or simply pursuing a passion, success looks different for everyone.

Success Isn’t a Destination, It’s a Journey

The truth is, success is not a destination. It’s not something you “achieve” once and for all—it’s an ongoing process, a continuous journey of growth, learning, and self-discovery. Some days, success might mean landing that dream job or reaching a fitness goal. Other days, success might simply mean finding the strength to keep going, to care for your mental health, or to be there for a friend in need.

By broadening our definition of success, we free ourselves from the pressure to fit into narrow, external standards. We allow ourselves to find joy in the everyday victories—both big and small—and to see our worth beyond society’s benchmarks.

Final Thoughts

Success, in its truest form, is about much more than accolades, wealth, or power. It’s about living a life true to who you are, forging deep connections with others, and aligning your actions with your values. It’s about growth, not perfection; purpose, not just achievement.

So, next time you find yourself comparing your journey to someone else’s, ask yourself: What does success mean to me? And am I living in a way that reflects that?

Because in the end, “making it” is something only you can define for yourself.

What does success mean to you? Share your thoughts in the comments below and let’s explore the deeper side of success together.